Rest in Peace my dear Mother.........
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Nanna Clarke....taken about 2 months ago in Brisbane |
I'll keep this short for now
(as I haven't had time for a full post for months, and certainly aren't up to it at this time),
but I'd like to announce the sad passing of my mother this week.........
Mum suffered a long battle with
bowel problems along with other medical problems including
Diabetes and Kidney Disease.....
Two weeks ago I called an ambulance due to mum suffering with violent vomiting which then turned into vomiting what I though was bile. It was diagnosed that she had suffered an
obstruction in the small bowel.
After 9 days in the hospital, Mum began to recover
(us thinking how great it was that she would not be needing corrective surgery)..... only to start asking for strong pain relief again. More investigation showed that at she had developed
another bowel obstruction which perforated within 24 hours. The infection that developed also
began to shut down her kidneys....... Once this was known it was decided by family and surgeons that she would not benefit from any surgeries, but only suffer more.....
The enormously tough decision was made to......
'just keep her comfortable for the next few days'.......
Mum kept up the good fight for quite a while.....after all, she's the strongest woman I've had the pleasure of knowing.......
I guess she decided for herself that those who needed to say goodbye...had done so...Mum had many loved ones visit over the last few days....even travelling from Brisbane and Victoria.
Some say that maybe she even knew that her 78 year life was beginning to come up short......planning a trip to Wodonga (600km) for a visit with two life long, very ill friends..
.(I worked it out that the three of them hadn't been in the same room for more than thirty years)......
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Cynthia, Freida & Mum
Reunited after more than thirty years.
I loved making this trip for mum. |
..........Followed by a trip to Brisbane (1800km), accompanied by my son Lloyd......"
Thanks matey...your Nanna could never have made such a huge trip if you didn't give up your entire school holidays to go with her and help her cope." I'm so proud of you Lloyd.....
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Lloyd with his Nan
This would be the last time Nan had any photos taken |
This Brisbane trip was to
meet for the first time....her two great-grand daughters Eliana and Nikaya from her 2nd born grand-daughter Marie...
(Marie is a wonderful photographer).
*Mum also has two great-grand sons from her first born grand-daughter Shona.
A 2nd trip for Eli and Nikaya to see their 'Gate-Nan' was planned for before Christmas, but this was not to be......
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Nikaya, Nanna Clarke and Eliana |
After gathering family from all over, I gave Mum many opportunities to finally go be with dad....
(Giving your mother permission to leave you, in a room full of other people that also don't want her to leave...is really tough, but she asked me to do this for her many years ago, if the situation ever presented itself).......So with this plan that she had always had....I guess I just thought that once she had 'seen everyone' she would gently pass away with many loved ones around her...which would have been nice......
With me busy putting all those plans in place....I never dreamed that it might be me, that would leave the room while she passed away.......
Mum's passing........
Both myself and my niece Shona (Marie's sister) kept a very tight bedside vigil with her for the last 48 hours. We had ordered pizza at 12 midnight, which was to be delivered at the hospital at roughly 12.45am. I told Shona to put her feet up and shut her eyes until I picked up the pizza from down stairs...I figured 45 minutes of shut-eye would be good for her as she had not rested since driving from Victoria with her two young boys. I planned to take the time to just tidy up the room a little and have room to serve the pizza.
Time passed and the pizza guy rang...Shona said...."That was a short 45 minutes"....and I looked at my watch...which read 12.21am.....I went down to the main entrance to collect the pizza. I was gone for a very brief time, as he was there waiting for me already. With pizza in hand, I casually walked down the long hallway of the ward...smiling at familiar faces who were still awake....and when I opened Mum's door.......
I could tell that her health had declined drastically.....I ran for the nurse and it was figured that it was probably less than 30 seconds before I entered the room that she gave her last breath. When the nurses entered her room she had already began losing her lovely glow......I knew by then, that my Mum had passed away. Shona and I both looked at each other with tears in total disbelief and soon decided that Mum passed away at 12.25am on 01 September 2012. Shona and I rang family to share the sad news, and after formalities and packing up her room, we left the hospital at 4.45am Saturday morning.
Mum had a gap of roughly just 3 to 5 minutes of being alone..... The perfect time I guess...if you don't want to cause your daughter or grand-daughter the pain of seeing you breathe your last breath and leaving this crazy wild world..........
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[[Dearest Mum.....you have no more back pain, no lack of circulation pain, no kidney troubles, no diabetes to worry about daily, no more nasty meds and injections, no more skin ulcers developing from your extremely thin skin, no concerns of going into a home, no worries about losing your memory like your mother did..... You were a great peace-keeper, the best I know, calming and stopping many wars....and you were a very generous person. You've taught me many skills along the way, skills I'm grateful for, skills that make me some of the mother I am today.....
My dear mother, you will be sadly missed....It's been 25 years since dad died....and that's an awful long time to be alone......It's time now Mum, for you to finally rest with Dad. I'll make sure that happens for you. I love you.]]